Big Wolf On Campus
as Merton Dingle
"I believe the technical term is YOWZA!!!"
"...it says right here in Saucy Teen Magazine-which is Becky's"
"Wake up and smell the carnage Tommy!"
"You the man, Merton. You the man!"
"The Badmintom Club rejected me. I couldn't say shuttlecock without giggling." *gigglez*
"R-O-W-D-I-E that is the way we spell rowdy. Funny, that's not how the dictionary spells it."
"I'm a senior getting stuffed into lockers. I'd have to check with the folks at Guiness, but I think that makes me the World's Biggest Loser!"
"What are you talking about? I've kissed a varitable cornicopea of chicks."
"...That's just an urban legend, although Pleasantville is not really an urban center. Technically we're a hamlet, a sleepy little berg."
"Tommy, sometimes the line between fantasy and reality get blurred. OK, when I was 9, I was so in love with Princess Leia, I thought that I could talk to her on my special pink phone."
"...Sure, no problem Tommy. And while I'm at it should I keep an eye peeled for Sonic the Hedgehog. Oh no, wait I can't. I've got a date with Lara Croft from Tomb Raider!"
"Spell caster. Right! He couldn't cast a shadow!"
"That goth poseur warlock wannabe!"
"...C'mon! You don't understand! You don't know how bad I want it!!!"
"...I'm invisible, my head's in a bag, and I'm totally naked!"
"Do you want it to look like you were chased around by a pair of haunted underpants?"
"Chumbawumba Wu-Tang Klan!!!"
"Do this Merton, do that Merton. Where's the love?!"
"I'd be the perfect werewolf Tommy. C'mon, bite me! Bite Me! BITE ME!!!!"
"The brain stays in the head! The brain stays in the head!!!"
[in a childish voice] "But I can fix things when I spill stuff or when I forget to watch a show on tv."
"Tommy, she's got balls!"
"You know the rules! No Girls in the lair!"
"From an old legend, and the third season of Buffy..."
"Yeah, I've been insulted alot."
"Luckily, boring people into a deep sleep is a speciality of mine."
"There's no way it will fail, but if it does, can I have your CDs?"